In the true spirit of the era of resurgent cultural nationalism of the moment, tantric Aghodi Kricketanand Saraswati Om 1008 emerged skull in hand from amidst the burning pyres at the holy city of Kashi after ‘ghor tap’, intensive interactive session with the spirits to defeat pseudo-secularists, and unveiled the key to India’s victories, especially the one over Pakistan as well as the ultimate 125-run defeat to Australia in the finals of the last World Cup.Recalling how Bhishma Pitamah in the Mahabharata decided to remain a brahmachari, got the boon of death at will and changed the course of history of Hastinapur, the Aghodi quoted the Atharvaveda (1.5.19), ‘‘Brahmacharya is so powerful that by strictly following it one can win over death.’’ Crediting the victory and felicitating bachelors Rahul David, Sehwag, Kaif, Yuvraj, Mongia, Zaheer and Nehra, Kricketanandjee appreciated the channelising of their energies by these modern brahmacharies for their motherland. The four married cricketers were conspicuously ignored.The modern spiritual guru, Sri Sitaramji Kapu, decried the encouragement of sex as a healthy practice. He revealed that the roots of this attitude can be found in the theory propagated by Dr Sigmund Freud who realised his folly in the last days of his life. Sitaramji enjoined his followers to follow, Dr Molvil Keith, MD, who proclaims, ‘‘This seed is marrow to your bones, food to your brains, oil to your joints and sweetness to your breath and if you are a man, you should never loose a drop of it until you are 30 and then only for the purpose of having a child which shall be blessed by heaven.”To a query as to the beneficial effects of brahmacharya and the channelising of the energies so released for the female of the species, Sitaramji took the view that Menakas and Urvashis had been through the ages taking not only men but even sages like Vishwamitra away from the path of salvation.Taking a slightly different tack, in a press release the Saffron Sangh Parivar welcomed the announcement of Aghodi Kricketanandjee and revealed that the disciplining of the senses in brahmacharya has long been an integral part of our culture. The decline in brahmacharya in society was attributed to the advent of Islam which permitted four wives and the rise of pseudo-secularists in the present era.Citing the example of Shri Lakshman who was away from his spouse for 14 years in the jungles of Dandkaranya for his elder brother Shri Ram, Jatkar of the Gajrang Dal was of the view that a similar contract could be obtained from the married cricketers, if necessary through legislation, in order to win the next world cup for Mother India.
