It's better late than never. I watched Dharam, finally. The film, which is suddenly in the news because of the controversy over India’s entry at the Oscars, deals with a brahmin priest’s predicament after adopting an agnyatakulsheel infant. It reminded me of my own little tryst with brahminism.My fish-eating, meat-eating Bengali Brahmin family was not orthodox. I never saw my father with the sacred thread. The only time we were reminded of our caste was when people would call Baba for a ‘brahmin bhoj’. But being a Brahmin definitely mattered. Needless to say, my brother’s thread ceremony was a big affair although he too stopped wearing it after a few years. Eyebrows were initially raised when I chose to marry a non-Brahmin, and I remember my mother asking why being a Brahmin did not matter to me. It was tough to make her understand that a woman has no caste. I was losing my caste because I was marrying somebody who was not a Brahmin. But nothing of this sort would have happened if my brother had done the same thing.I have asked many women if being Brahmin ever benefited them. While the older ones came up with clichés like, ‘Brahmins enjoy respect’, the younger always replied in the negative. In this age of reservations, even young Brahmin men hold a similar opinion.But I did once encash my caste. It was Holi, and before my marriage. Some of us in the office had planned to spend the holiday at Renukaji, a small temple town in Himachal set by a lake bearing the same name. With all the eating joints shut, we had no option but to partake of a temple langar. As we finished eating, some people came asking if any of us were Brahmins. All the men who said yes were given Rs 10 as dakshina. Then came my turn. When I admitted to my Brahmin roots, they observed, “Oh, a Brahmin kanya.” They then gave me a five-rupee coin.The coin is still with me. Do I treasure it as my only recognition as a Brahmin? Or is it to remind me of bias against my gender? Neither. But every time I see the coin, my stand on the issue gets stronger and clearer. The value of caste system to me is not more than Rs 5.
