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Journalism of Courage
Dabba Cartel actor Shabana Azmi recently opened up about her over four-decade marriage to lyricist Javed Akhtar and shared that, while they fight like every other couple, she swears by a marriage trick to resolve conflicts — one taught by none other than her husband.
“Please don’t be under the illusion that everything is hunky dory between Javed and me, ya hum sirf pyaar mohabbat ki baatein karte hai (or we only talk about love and romance). We fight a lot, we shout a lot. We can get really angry with each other, like all relationships do, but I think there is a marriage trick that he has taught me,” Azmi told Pinkvilla.
According to her, Javed once said, ‘You know when we are really angry with each other, either one of us should just say, drop it, and the other should drop it. Because what happens is when you are angry, you say things that you later regret, and then later revisit them when you are not as angry.’
She added, “Let me tell you, it is a mantra which I think all couples should exercise.”
Successful relationships are built on trust, clear communication, and mutual respect towards each other, such that conflicts can be resolved without pushing them, said Dr Santosh Bangar, senior consultant psychiatrist, Gleneagles Hospitals Parel, Mumbai.
“Open and honest communication and being able to trust each other to resolve conflicts help the partners to express their thoughts and feelings. Trust strengthens the bond, ensuring security and emotional stability in the relationship. Empathy and understanding will help one to see things from your partner’s perspective, help further build an emotional connection,” said Dr Bangar.
Moreover, efforts from both sides are equally important. Couples need to make an effort, appreciate, and notice small gestures to keep their relationship strong and going.
“Conflicts are part and parcel of the relationship, but resolving them with patience, open dialogue, and willingness to listen ensures long-term peace and understanding. When both partners commit to growing together, embracing imperfections, and prioritising each other, the relationship will surely be strong over the years and decades,” said Dr Bangar.
