‘Threw out all my sanitary napkins’: Farah Khan on how she and husband Shirish Kunder manifested their triplets

Are there any limitations to manifestation when it comes to significant life events, and how should one balance hope with realistic expectations?

By: Lifestyle Desk
New Delhi | Updated: December 26, 2024 04:17 PM IST

4 min read

Farah Khan on manifesting her kids (Source: Instagram/Farah Khan Kunder)

Manifestation is often talked about as a powerful tool to turn desires into reality, and filmmaker Farah Khan has shared her own unique experience with it.

In a conversation with Debina Bonnerjee on her podcast, Khan described how she and her husband, Shirish Kunder, approached their journey to parenthood. “Shirish and I both started manifesting. This is a funny story, I went to my bathroom cupboard and threw out all my sanitary napkins and packets out of the house, thinking that I’m not going to get my period and I’m going to get pregnant,” she said.

Khan’s story took an intriguing turn when they initially planned for one child, then decided on two, and eventually envisioned three. “So we literally decided their names and pet names… reading The Secret… so just to imagine our two kids crawling. After 2-3 weeks when the doctor called me, I was very clear that she was going to give me good news. And she told me you are definitely pregnant. She told me that I had multiple embryos or twins. Then after Sirish and I started thinking we will have three children… so we started manifesting another small one (sic).”

The result? The confirmation of twins, followed by the addition of a third embryo. After a week, she mentioned, the doctor called again and the couple knew instinctively that they were having triplets.

The psychological mechanisms behind manifestation and how it might influence a person’s actions and outcomes

Sonal Khangarot, licensed rehabilitation counsellor and psychotherapist, The Answer Room, tells indianexpress.com, Manifestation refers to the process of bringing a desired outcome or goal into reality by focusing your thoughts, beliefs, and actions on it. The idea is that what you consistently think, feel, and believe can shape your external circumstances — visualisation playing a key role in influencing your reality. From a psychological perspective, this process can be understood as rooted in cognitive-behavioural principles and the interplay of thoughts, beliefs, and actions.”

Khangarot breaks it down further:

Cognitive Reframing: Manifestation often begins with setting a clear intention or goal, aligning with the psychological process of focusing thoughts on a desired outcome. This practice can shift one’s mindset from negative to positive, boosting motivation and confidence. However, it’s important to remember that manifestation is just one tool among many and requires consistency alongside other dimensions.
Visualisation and Mental Rehearsal: When people visualise their goals as already achieved, they engage in mental rehearsal. This cognitive exercise strengthens neural pathways associated with success, similar to how athletes use visualisation to enhance performance.
Self-Fulfilling Prophecy: Psychologist Robert Rosenthal’s research on self-fulfilling prophecy shows how beliefs influence behaviour. Believing in your ability to achieve a goal can drive actions aligned with that goal, thereby increasing the chances of success.
Reticular Activating System (RAS): The brain’s RAS filters information based on what we focus on. By concentrating on specific desires, the RAS makes you more attuned to opportunities or resources that align with those desires, aiding in goal attainment.

Consulting fertility experts, understanding treatment options, and joining support groups can offer a balanced perspective. (Source: Freepik)

Limitations to manifestation

Manifestation works best as a psychological motivator, Khangarot stresses, not as a substitute for tangible actions or professional care. “While positive visualisation can inspire proactive behaviours — like adhering to medical advice or seeking emotional support — it cannot override the biological complexities of fertility.”

The limitation lies in significant life events, such as conception, where multiple variables are at play. Unrealistic expectations can lead to frustration and feelings of failure. Balancing manifestation with realistic expectations involves grounding oneself in facts while staying open to hope. “Consulting fertility experts, understanding treatment options, and joining support groups can offer a balanced perspective. Hope should complement informed decision-making, not replace it,” suggests Khangarot.

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