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Journalism of Courage
We often struggle to put the phone down. It seems to be no different for actor Katrina Kaif, who recently shared how she sometimes finds it extremely hard to disconnect while admitting that it is crucial. “There are times when my husband (Vicky Kaushal) says, ‘Put down that phone. Put it down. Put it down now.’ Because I will be like, I am sending one more mail, I am sending one more important mail…When you are a business owner, there is no schedule,” Kaif told The Week.
Addressing how she tackled the issue, Kaif said, “You have to apply those rules for yourself. You have to apply that time. Otherwise, I can go on sending emails through the night. I can go on having discussions with my team because they are passionate and can go on brainstorming. But now I think I have learned the importance of having those guidelines. You have to. Everything in life, you have to set guidelines for yourself to keep the right balance.”
Jaisleen Kaur, image consultant, soft skills trainer, and life coach, Dehradun, noted that in the era of constant connectivity, it’s not uncommon to find ourselves engrossed in our phones, navigating a digital landscape that keeps us plugged in 24/7. “While technology has undoubtedly enriched our lives, it can also present challenges, especially when one partner finds solace in their device more often than in face-to-face interactions,” said Kaur.
Dr Divya G. Nallur, clinical director and senior consultant psychiatrist, Amaha, described that addiction is characterised by the increasing use of a particular behaviour to the point that other pleasures are lost. “This can involve ignoring family,” said Dr Nallur.
Just like Kaushal and Kaif, one should work together to establish clear boundaries regarding phone usage. “Define specific times or situations where both of you commit to being fully present with each other, free from digital distractions. This could be during meals, date nights, or other quality time you spend together,” said Kaur.
It is crucial to understand that there may be times when phone use is necessary, such as for work or emergencies. “Discuss and establish guidelines for these situations, ensuring that both partners feel comfortable and secure when genuine exceptions to the phone-free zones occur,” said Kaur.
It’s also essential to “acknowledge and appreciate efforts made by your partner to reduce phone usage” and prioritise your relationship. “Positive reinforcement goes a long way in fostering behavioural changes. Celebrate small victories and milestones, reinforcing the idea that building a stronger connection is a joint effort,” said Kaur.
With time, revisit your set guidelines and ensure they still work for both partners. “For more serious conditions involving addictive behaviour, professional support through therapy, combined with social support from family and friends, may become necessary,” said Dr Nallur.
