Facing family threats and police separation, interfaith couple stands strong: ‘We’re resolute about marrying’

Last Friday, the HC assured the couple they would remain under its protection until their wedding. They have since begun the process, submitting their notice of intent to marry under the Special Marriage Act (SMA) on August 4.

Speaking exclusively to The Indian Express over a phone call from a government safe house in Delhi after court proceedings, the woman says they are now waiting for the 30-day notice period to end to get married.

“I left home with a bag containing my degrees, other documents, and a pair of clothes, and boarded a flight to Delhi. My family had been trying to arrange my marriage for a while. In April, they tried to fix a match. I refused without revealing that I already had a partner, because that would have only made things more difficult for all of us. But it was a sign that we needed to get married,” the 25-year-old recounts.

A day after she arrived in the Capital, she and her partner approached the office of the DCP (Southeast Delhi) seeking police protection. She was told she would have to undergo a medical examination, in line with the Delhi Police’s SOP for safe houses and special cells for inter-caste or interfaith couples, as per the Supreme Court’s directions.

The SOP, seen by The Indian Express, contained no such instructions.

On July 24, she says she was taken to a women’s shelter home against her will.

“When we first went to the Sarita Vihar DCP office seeking protection. They told us there was no such thing as a safe house, saying, ‘kuch bhi kar lo, kuch hoga toh nahi (do whatever you want, nothing will happen)’. The DCP later repeated that there was no such concept. Then they said I had to undergo a medical test. We assumed it was an order from higher authorities, so I consented, hoping the ordeal would end soon,” she says.

“But my partner was not medically examined, and we were separated. I was taken to a women’s shelter home against my will, where I was not allowed to keep my phone, meet my partner, or even contact him. I was only permitted to speak with my family,” she adds.

Her partner, meanwhile, moved the HC. On July 25, the court ordered the DCP to provide them police protection and shift them to a government safe house.

The couple had met in 2018 at a coaching centre in Prayagraj, where they used to study.

“Soon, our families had begun looking for a match, which we refused. While he told his family about our relationship last December, I couldn’t do the same — I always knew it was a strict no-no. Back in 2019, my mausi (aunt) discovered I was chatting with him. She called the women’s helpline and forced me to tell the police that he was harassing me. I was very scared at the time, and I gave in,” she says.

“Since 2019, we have been resolute that we wanted to get married. We kept thinking and waiting that maybe the situation would get better for interfaith couples — but it just keeps getting worse, with laws coming in to dissuade interfaith marriages,” she adds.

Meanwhile, on Friday, following the Delhi HC’s suggestion that she call her father to assure him she was safe and healthy, she had a tense conversation with him.

Reporting back to the court, she said her father was initially emotional during the brief call but later told her, “Come back in a week, or else we will be writing to Yogi [Adityanath, UP CM].”

She says that while most marriages in her family have been arranged, her maternal uncle was the first to defy tradition by marrying outside his caste.

She is now facing threats from the same uncle. On August 2, she alleges, he sent her a chilling message with her partner’s photo, saying, “Yahi hai naa? Kab tak bachega? (This is the one? How long will he survive?)”

She says when her uncle got married in 2016–17, he didn’t inform the family. “It was only when they began looking for a match for him that he revealed he was already married. The family didn’t speak to him for a few years, but it’s different for men — they eventually came around. It’s not the same for me.”

“While my parents were always supportive of my education, they wanted me to stay in Prayagraj and follow family norms and traditions, including letting them decide whom I would marry. I was made to feel that padhaya jaa raha hai toh ehsaan kar rahe hain (educating me was a favour they were doing).”

She speaks about how her partner’s family is more welcoming.

“His household, on the other hand, is very different. I see how respectful he is to his mother and sisters,” says the BEd graduate, who is on the lookout for employment at present.

Her partner works at a Delhi-based private company.

“Neither of us is religious, and our worldviews are quite similar. We decided to marry under the SMA after much thought and research. There’s mutual respect and understanding between us — we let each other be, without any impositions — and this decision is the result of weathering ups and downs over the years,” she says, adding that while her partner’s family has been accommodating, they too have feared possible police harassment.

The woman also says the NGO Dhanak went above and beyond in helping her cope with family pressure, guiding the couple on legal remedies, and assisting with their SMA formalities — but her disappointment with the Delhi Police’s conduct is evident.

“It was only with the court’s directions that we were taken to a safe house.”

The woman says they just want to get married without any hitch. I’m anticipating my parents may come to the wedding and voice their opposition, but I’m preparing for such a scenario.”