Living On A Prayer

That, in essence, is what Australia need now. If the Ashes series is to be drawn, Ricky Ponting and his men must wear down not just England’s bowlers, but their own assorted Nokias and Sony Ericssons.

Yes, this has been one of the best cricket series ever played. Yes, it has revalidated the future of Test cricket. Yes, each Test match has been a ripping contest. Yes, England have outplayed the world champions. Yes, Australia’s much-vaunted batting has, like a tardy courier company, failed to deliver the goods.

Surprisingly, for a series with so much drama, the two most significant batting partnerships were a mere 17 runs and 13 runs respectively. McGrath and Lee held on for a partnership of 17 to save the third Test, while Hoggard and Giles put on 13 to win the fourth Test, giving England a 2-1 lead.

With Australia on the back foot in more ways than one, Ponting’s band of hitherto merry men must be prepared for recriminations.

The batsman whose career is now being seriously questioned in some Australian circles is opener Matthew Hayden, who has gone 16 Tests and 30 innings without a century. But Mark Taylor, accustomed to media scrutiny, is championing Hayden’s cause. Taylor and his former opening partner, Geoff Marsh, see no reason to drop Hayden. Indeed, Marsh points out that a player of Hayden’s calibre, with 20 centuries and a Test average above 50, is not the sort of batsman to ‘‘just lose it’’.

That said, Hayden has scored only 180 runs in his eight Test innings in this series, with 36 his highest score. Contrast that with the ebullient batting of tailenders Shane Warne and Brett Lee and you get a clear picture of how the tail has saved Australia from even greater embarrassment.

Lee, having topscored twice, has 152 runs to his name with two scores above 40. And Warne, as if to rub salt in Hayden’s wounds, has 249 runs to his credit, with a 90 at Old Trafford, 42 at Edgbaston and 45 at Trent Bridge.

This week, I was told a great yarn about a couple of Aussie cricket fanatics who are following the Test caravan around the British Isles. One, a journalist, noted that a bookie was offering 25-1 on Lee being the top scorer in Australia’s first innings at Trent Bridge. Being a cautious type, he put down a fiver.

Then he bumped into his mate, a former Test cricketer. Strewth, replied the latter, great odds. And off he strode to invest thirty quid on Lee. The tailender, reinvigorated after spending the past 18 months on Test cricket’s sidelines, thumped a quick 47 and the pair of punters was exceedingly gleeful, the ex-cricketer pocketing no less than 750 pounds.

But not everyone’s celebrating. In the fallout from Australia’s hollow batting, it is former opening batsman Michael Slater who has taken the toughest stance. ‘‘The time has come for Australia to drop Matthew Hayden,’’ Slater told the Herald Sun. ‘‘I’ve been a big supporter of his but with the Ashes on the line, it is time to make changes.’’

But the big Queenslander at the centre of the storm took time off last week to do what he does best — fishing.

Having spent so much time on this tour with — metaphorically — egg on his face, Hayden was up north in the fishing havens of Scotland, getting, literally, salmon blood smeared all over his visage.

Sitting by the bank of the River Spey, he landed a 3.5kg salmon and was informed that local tradition dictated an angler’s first fish has to be knocked on the head to draw blood. He told reporters with a wry smile that he thought it was a practical joke but went along with it, quite content to walk around with a bloody face to prove his skills.

The question now is, should Hayden, like Cinderella, go for the ball?

Perhaps not. Ian Chappell and Steve Waugh feel that he must be more temperate in his attitude towards opening the innings, while Hayden concedes that his experience tells him otherwise. ‘‘I’m too old,’’ he said, ‘‘to be tinkering. It’s important to listen to your peers, but it’s very important for me to keep things simple.’’

But what of the rest of the Australian batting lineup in a side where only Ponting has made a Test century in this series? Waugh insists the batting needs no tweaking. He is confident they are all class players who will respond to the pressure and Australia’s purposes would be best served by retaining the same squad for the Oval Test.

Even in the light of the outbursts by — and subsequent fines to — Ponting and Katich, Waugh feels that Australia made only one vital mistake. There should never have been any predictions of a 5-0 whitewash, he says. ‘‘Saying it’s going to be 5-0 puts enormous pressure on the guys when things start to go a little bit wrong.’’

So, can the side that won the first Test by 239 runs recoup to win the fifth? If the tourists do win at the Oval, they will square the series and retain the Ashes.

The pain of surrendering them for the first time in 16 years would cut deep into the selectors’ plans for the future not just of Hayden, but his colleagues at the top of the order.

The quintessential recreational angler, Hayden will have to remember the cardinal rule. No fishing outside his off stump.