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Adolescents and young adults face a host of pressures in life, with so much stress and uncertainty surrounding them. All this makes this age group moody, distant from the family and snappy. It isn’t always easy for parents to distinguish between normal growing-up tantrums and mental health concerns like depression. The Centres for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), in the US, reported in 2021 that more than four in 10 (42 per cent) students felt persistently sad or hopeless and nearly one-third (29 per cent) experienced poor mental health. Depression is a mental health problem that has a big impact on one’s life. It takes away the energy and motivation one needs to get things done. Your love and support during this phase can go a long way to get your young mind back on track.
Everyone goes through certain phases when their mood is low and feel sad, for an hour to a couple of days depending on the situation causing it. But when this persists for a period of two weeks, begins to interfere with daily life and one feels disinterested in things they usually enjoy, it is called Depression.
Not everyone who is depressed experiences the same type and intensity of symptoms. Sometimes people who have depression may even appear absolutely “fine” to loved ones. Know the most common signs in teenagers and young adults when depressed:
Feel like being alone, away from friends and family
Decreased enthusiasm
Academic decline
Absenteeism at School or College
Higher use of alcohol and drugs
Sad
Irritable, Angry and agitated most of the time
Do not feel like doing anything
Unable to concentrate on studies
Higher screen time
How to Support them:
Avoid Reinforcing “Depressed” – It’s extremely important to create a distance between your loved one from depression. Depression is an ailment and does not need to become part of their identity, such as “you are depressed”, or “my depressed child”. The symptoms do not define them as a person, it is temporary. Choose your words carefully as they are highly sensitive to negative comments or criticism at this stage.
Compassionate Communication – Have a dialogue with your child on the signs you have noticed and express your concern. Don’t let the fear of their emotional outburst block you from reaching out. They need your love and non-judgmental support more than anything. The most important thing for someone at this stage is to talk. So as a parent, just be willing to listen and focus on acknowledging their feelings, turmoil and problems. Listening attentively will make them feel understood and heard.
Combat isolation – If they spend hours alone in their rooms and devices, they have withdrawn from friends and family. Isolation makes depression worse. So do all you can to connect with them in activities that would engage them for short periods. It could be anything of their interest. Call their close friends or cousins over to spend time together. They will regain their enthusiasm gradually.
Encourage Active movement – Even though the lethargy that sets in the mind and body with depression makes one not feel like moving or getting out of bed. Exercise or dance will give the much-needed adrenaline pump and sweat. Encourage it for even just 10 minutes or do it along with them – it will do a lot of good for your young mind.
One needs to understand that no one chooses to have depression. It is an illness that happens due to an unforeseen event, genetics, adverse childhood experiences and sometimes for no obvious singular reason. Depression becomes more damaging when left untreated. The worrisome symptoms will not disappear on its own. You could talk to a psychologist or counsellor, they have the skills to help you and your family through this phase.
Shubhika Singh is a senior consultant psychologist specializing in young adults and the co-founder of Innerkraft.com based in Kolkata
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