Jaane Kahaan Se Aayi Hai

Rating: *

What is a loser-type to do if all pretty females turn away from him? Why,go out to an open field on a dark night ,and wait for a beautiful creature from Venus to fall in his lap. That’s what happens to Rajesh ( Deshmukh),and the ‘pari’ whom he catches is Fernandes,in layers of frilly white gauze,and a smile as big as the ocean.

Good idea,which needed zany treatment. But the debutant director who’s written such movies as ‘Jhankaar Beats’ and ‘Masti’,can’t quite make up his mind whether he wants to do a risqué comedy or a soulful love story. He tries for both and achieves neither.

For the first,he makes Rajesh’s best friend ( Malhotra) a sex fiend who watches videos by the name of The Pink Pussycat and slobbers over every female in sight. When the damsel from Venus hoves into view,he says : she is from Venus,and I have a big … All we can say,if we are very kind,is that Zaveri knows how to rhyme. The naughty video keeps showing up through the film : it’s not just the best friend who can’t wait to watch X- rated stuff,Rajesh’s father ( Shah) is an equally eager potential viewer,puffing and panting along like an over-charged steam engine.

And then of course there’s the main track between Deshmukh and Fernandes : she’s dropped off on earth,via a big spaceship,because she wants to know about,what do you know,Love (it seems on her planet,babies are born via computer). But I’m hard put to recall a duller segment : practically everything about the film,including this pair which we last saw in ‘Aladin’, feels like we’ve seen it a hundred times over.

And this from a new young director in brave new Bollywood.