‘I howled my lungs out’: When Sushmita Sen almost withdrew from Miss India after learning Aishwarya Rai was competing; how self-doubt can impact performance

She continued, “I had taken my form back knowing that Miss Aishwarya Rai was entering the pageant and I’m like why bother? I mean, she’s beautiful and then she’s it for Miss India. Why bother contending with her and then coming back and saying, ‘I tried mama.’ But thank God for my mother. She always has explained to me, Karan, that there’s a thing in life called an upset… and you will never know if you can be an upset to someone or someone else can be that to you, unless you give it a shot. So, she said, ‘You come back to me having lost to the woman you think is beautiful, and that’s fine. Do go and be andhon mein kala raja, as they say.”

She admitted that it was because of her mother that she went for it. She recalled, “I howled my lungs out because I had told my mother not to come for the pageant because I said, ‘Why do you want to come and embarrass yourself and me in front of so many people?’”

When Karan asked if she thought she deserved to win, Sushmita replied, “Most definitely, without a thought.” She further explained, “I don’t compare myself to Aishwarya’s performance. I think she was fabulous on stage. I do believe in two things: One, that night, I was the best, and that’s why I deserved to win, not because I was better than someone else. It is only because I was at my best.”

This raises an important question: how does self-doubt impact performance in high-stakes competitions, and what strategies can help overcome it?

Sonal Khangarot, licensed rehabilitation counsellor and psychotherapist, The Answer Room, tells indianexpress.com, “Self-doubt can significantly hinder an individual’s performance in competitive environments. It often leads to increased anxiety, reduced concentration, and a decline in overall effectiveness. A study by Woodman and Hardy (2003) found a small but significant positive relationship between self-confidence and performance, indicating higher self-confidence correlates with better performance outcomes. Conversely, self doubt can erode this confidence, leading to suboptimal performance.”

Sushmita revealed that she had initially decided to withdraw her entry form after learning that Aishwarya was participating. (Source: Express photo by Hemant Mehta)

To combat self doubt, Khangarot suggests individuals can employ several strategies: 

Positive Self Talk: Replacing  negative thoughts with positive affirmations can enhance self-belief and reduce anxiety. 

Visualisation: Imagining successful outcomes can prepare the mind for actual performance, increasing confidence. Several sports personalities and actors across the globe use it.

⁠Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Deep breathing and meditation can help maintain focus and manage irritational thoughts and worries.

Role of external validation in shaping confidence

External validation plays a crucial role in the development of self confidence, Khangarot notes,  especially in fields like beauty pageants where appearance and perception are paramount. “Positive reinforcement from peers, mentors, and an audience can affirm an individual’s abilities and worth, thereby enhancing self-esteem,” she states

However, overreliance on self-esteem can be detrimental as it may lead to a fragile sense of self that is overly dependent on other people’s opinions. Balancing external validation with internal self acceptance is essential for substantial confidence, concludes Khangarot. 

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