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Journalism of Courage
Sex has always been considered to be a taboo subject that is brushed under the carpet. So it is not surprising to know that sexual aftercare is also “a pretty neglected topic.” But, according to experts, sexual aftercare is extremely important and “should be a part of sex, just like foreplay,” as pointed out by Dr Yuvraj Jadeja, a gynecologist and IVF specialist, on Instagram.
Agreeing with him, Dr Jagriti Varshney, a gynaecologist and obstetrician, told indianexpress.com that in simple words, sexual aftercare is the simple act of caring for a person’s partner or partners after having sexual intercourse. “Supporting and checking in with each other after sexual intercourse is important as sex may leave people feeling different emotions, such as happy, confused, drained or exposed,” she said, adding that sexual aftercare is vital for creating a holistic sexual experience and deepening intimacy.
Quoting a study from 2014, the expert added that affectionate behaviour after sex is linked to higher sexual and relationship satisfaction.
Highlighting the same, Dr Jadeja took to Instagram and wrote that sexual aftercare, as a term, “gained visibility in the BDSM community; however, aftercare should always be a part of sex, just like foreplay.”
Here is everything you need to know about aftercare, as per the expert:
Aftercare can include, but is not limited to:
*Cuddling
*Pillow talk
*Discussing things that went well
*Having a snack
*Watching a TV show together
*Taking a shower together
However, aftercare differs from couple to couple. “Ask your partner what they need. It is also essential as a receiver to ask for what you need,” he wrote.
Adding, Dr Varshney said that aftercare can be both physical as well as emotional. “For instance, physical aftercare can include peeing after sex, having a soothing drink or snack with your partner, whereas emotional aftercare might be talking to your partner about your desires, wants and needs, or giving each other positive reinforcement,” she said.
Why is aftercare important?
“We must admit that sex is vulnerable, and nobody wants to feel tossed aside after sex. Aftercare makes sure that everyone is respected so they can feel good about themselves after a sexual experience. It does not matter if you’re friends with benefits, in a long-term relationship, a one-night stand, or married. Aftercare is just as important,” he stressed.
Dr Jadeda mentioned that aftercare can also help relieve sexual shame. “Sex can sometimes bring up feelings of shame because of sex-negative messages many of us faced growing up. But aftercare can also diminish any post-sexual shame, making you feel more emotionally afterwards,” he pointed out.
He also mentioned, “Aftercare leads to a better sexual experience. Whether you’re having casual sex or committed sex, whether you’re having kinky sex or vanilla sex, aftercare should always be part of it.”
On similar lines, Dr Varshney said, “Sexual aftercare becomes even more vital if one has had a bad sexual experience in the past, is suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder or any kind of sexual trauma,” concluding that aftercare provides a supportive environment for partners to have a meaningful and positive experience.
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