‘Instantly, the call would go to my mother-in-law’: Neil Nitin Mukesh on embracing differences in marriage; tips for maintaining harmony

When asked about the last time they fought, Mukesh revealed, “I mean, we don’t fight fight as such. We fought earlier in our teething days. Instantly, the call would go to my mother-in-law.” He also mentioned that their arguments were never particularly intense or severe.

“She’s also much younger than me, she is also very mature in that sense… but there’s a very childlike quality in her. So I had to accept that in her and understand it in my initial days also… and I wasn’t prepared for that,” he expressed. His remarks underline the need for patience and empathy in building a strong relationship foundation.

Every relationship requires effort to bridge gaps in expectations and communication styles. When partners embrace each other’s individuality, it can pave the way for growth and harmony. Understanding these dynamics can help couples foster healthier relationships.

How can couples manage differences in emotional maturity or personality to maintain harmony in their relationship?

Psychologist Anjali Gursahaney tells indianexpress.com, “Every relationship involves navigating differences — whether in emotional maturity, personality, or life experiences. These differences can create challenges, but they also offer opportunities for growth and deeper connection.”

According to her, here’s how couples can address these aspects to maintain harmony and strengthen their bond:

• Foster Understanding: Recognise that emotional maturity develops through experience, not age. Understanding your partner’s perspective without judgement builds trust and patience.
• Celebrate Individual Strengths: Instead of viewing differences as problems, see them as complementary traits. For example, one partner’s optimism may balance the other’s pragmatism.
• Establish Mutual Goals: Aligning on shared values helps bridge gaps in personality or maturity, creating a united front despite differences.

Self-awareness and communication are vital for a healthy relationship (Source: Freepik)

Adapting to traits you may find challenging

Every partner brings unique qualities to a relationship, some of which may initially be challenging to accept. To adapt, start by identifying what truly matters — distinguishing between fundamental incompatibilities and differences that simply require adjustment. Focus on the positives, recognising how these traits might enrich your relationship; for example, a partner’s spontaneity could lead to exciting shared experiences. 

“Practice patience and empathy, allowing time to adjust to each other’s habits while openly discussing challenges and acknowledging their feelings. Finally, prioritize compromise by working together to find middle ground, as small changes on both sides can significantly ease navigating such differences,” highlights Gursahaney. 

The role of self-awareness and communication

Self-awareness and communication are vital for a healthy relationship, especially when navigating differences. Understanding your own triggers, expectations, and boundaries helps manage conflicts calmly and fosters personal growth. “Open communication, using ‘I’ statements, allows you to express concerns without making your partner defensive, while active listening ensures they feel heard and respected. Regular check-ins to discuss what’s working and address concerns prevent issues from escalating. If challenges persist, seeking support through couples’ therapy can provide a constructive space to strengthen the relationship,” concludes Gursahaney. 

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