‘It was long-distance’: Neena Gupta on continuing her ‘on and off’ relationship with Vivian Richards after the birth of their daughter; expert on stable co-parenting dynamic

Their unconventional relationship was shaped by distance, circumstance and the pressures of public life. “Vivian and I had an affair, and I got pregnant. He had already returned home when I found out,” she wrote. “Some people advised me to get an abortion. Others cautioned against the perils of being a single parent… But once I was back home and alone, I asked myself: What do you think? How does this make you feel? The answer was: I was giddy with joy.” 

Neena also acknowledged Vivian’s right to be part of the decision: “I also understood that I wasn’t the only person who had a say in the situation. The baby’s father, Vivian, had an equal right.” Though their relationship didn’t follow a traditional path, they shared moments that were deeply human. “Our relationship continued on and off for a few years and we had some beautiful moments and also some ugly ones. It was long-distance and a very different kind of relationship.”

Psychological challenges or emotional strength it takes to raise a child alone, especially in a society where single motherhood is still stigmatised

Neena’s story highlights the emotional complexity of single parenting in a society still grappling with outdated norms. Psychologist Rasshi Gurnani explains that raising a child alone requires deep emotional resilience. “Single mothers often face chronic stress, anticipatory anxiety, and internalised guilt, not because of their reality, but because of the social lens they’re viewed through,” she says. To cope, mothers need strong self-worth, psychological flexibility, and consistent emotional regulation.

In cases where the father is supportive but not physically present, what are some ways to nurture a stable co-parenting dynamic?

When the father remains supportive but distant, a stable co-parenting dynamic is still possible. “It requires setting boundaries, respectful communication, and emotional availability from both sides,” adds Gurnani. 

Children thrive when there’s predictability, even in unconventional arrangements. Scheduled calls, shared decision-making, and emotional consistency from the non-residential parent can go a long way in making the child feel supported.

How can one deal with the social judgement and unsolicited advice?

As for societal judgement, often in the form of unsolicited advice like abortion suggestions or warnings about single motherhood, Gurnani says the best defense is strong psychological boundaries. “These opinions usually stem from inherited beliefs, not real concern. Women need to stay anchored in their values and decisions,” she explains. 

Building a trusted support system — whether through friends, therapy, or chosen family — helps shield against social stigma and emotional burnout.

From the homepage

Prashant Kishor claims top BJP leadership intimidated his candidates into withdrawing

Trump tariffs made US unviable, so Andhra looks at Australia for seafood exports

Narayana Murthy, apathy, and a boycott call: How Karnataka govt caste survey has hit a snag in Bengaluru