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Journalism of Courage
It’s not uncommon to encounter challenges that test our relationships, but maintaining a strong and resilient relationship requires more than just love — it demands conscious effort and commitment. If you’re seeking ways to strengthen your relationship, Clinton Power, a relationship counsellor and marriage therapist took to Instagram to share 3 things that will help you.
“Love may be the foundation of a great relationship, but being in love isn’t enough to keep it strong on its own,” he wrote.
Conflicts are bound to occur in any relationship, but many couples get stuck in a cycle of avoidance instead of dealing with it constructively. In such a scenario, open communication, active listening, and finding common ground are essential, Power advises. “Conflicts aren’t the end; they’re opportunities to deepen your connection.”
When you do have a disagreement, Power says it’s critical to repair well and repair soon. “Rushing to repair is the secret ingredient to managing conflict effectively.” However, if you don’t have the skills to do this, the support and guidance of a relationship counsellor might help.
To navigate conflicts as a couple effectively, Sidhharrth S Kumaar, relationship coach, NumroVani, tells indianexpress.com that finding the right time to discuss a disagreement is important. “Pick a convenient moment to talk about conflicts. Steer clear of moments when you are both feeling anxious or worn out. A peaceful, comfortable setting can help with greater comprehension and problem solving.”
Additionally, leave aside your ego and be flexible. “Use “I” statements and communicate your emotions without assigning any blame on your partner. Avoid criticising your partner and refrain from interrupting them while they’re speaking. It’s critical to communicate your demands and sentiments in a clear and concise manner, but finding solutions that satisfy both parties might constitute a compromise,” Kumaar says.
Being assertive in a relationship is about expressing your needs without losing who you are. Many people conflate assertiveness with aggression; however, Power says that being assertive is about honesty and respect, and not picking fights. “When you’re assertive, you’re not dominating the conversation or using aggression to get your point across.”
According to Kumaar, assertiveness harmonises a relationship where both have an equal voice, improves self-esteem and confidence, makes conflict management easier and harbours a conducive environment for open communication. “Saying no to things you don’t want to do is okay, even if it means letting your partner down. But listen to your partner’s view equally well without being biased,” he says.
Power remarks that he is often surprised by how many people he has worked with over the years struggle with giving and receiving love. However, he feels that love isn’t just about the grand gestures, but the everyday stuff. “Consistent affection, appreciation, and support are the things that make a difference here. The little things create a positive environment and continue to top up your emotional bank account.”
But mind you! Giving love is a two-way street. “Knowing your partner’s love language, curating shared memories, honouring each other’s accomplishments and expressing affection through physical or verbal cues is essential. Love is a journey rather than a destination. Cherish the small moments, the giggles you share, and the silent understanding,” Kumaar says.
