It’s that time of a World Cup year. When England gets sudden crash-courses in crushed ligaments and broken bones, and obsessive anxiety over metatarsal X-rays of Messrs Beckham, G Neville, Owen and Rooney.
The nation mourns as one, as precious feet twitch and crack in deathly silence — the thudding blows coming from innocuous challenges and seemingly inoffensive collisions as key World Cup players wince and crumple to the floor in agony. The precedents go back to 1966 when Jimmy Greaves’ shin acted up in the Cup-winning edition and Bryan Robson’s twin-jinx in ‘86 and ‘90, the rattling body crying from a dislocated shoulder and Achilles tendon and toe respectively.
The injuries lulled out for a dozen years after that, but so did their progress beyond quarters. The metatarsal’s sensational debut in the English public’s tortured conscience happened with Beckham in 2002, and the vexatious group of bones have wickedly haunted the world’s most scrutinised football team (dissected in English at least) ever since.
Recuperating defenders Gary Neville and Ledley King and their broken feet proved almighty headaches for Eriksson in subsequent editions, though nothing matched the despair of Michael Owen hobbling off against Sweden and last time’s misgivings over Wayne Rooney as wordsmiths and English World Cup tragics penned dramatic laments and elegies, wailing over assorted injuries.
It’s not like coach Alejandro Sabella is not sweating over Angel Di Maria in Argentina or Jose Pekerman’s not worried about Radamel Falcao in Colombia, but no World Cup preview feels complete until the English start moaning. So there’s wicked anticipation in the air, of what misery lies on their path to Manaus.
Arsenal’s Jack Wilshere’s set to turn up against Norwich this weekend, but Roy Hodgson has the iffy Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain and Theo Walcott to drive him to wretched insomnia, even as he’d love to wrap in cottonwool the two Dannys — Welbeck and Sturridge.
Still, the devilish mind lies in wait for distressing tidings of yet another injury drama to unfold in that part of the world. A notorious torn tendon, tabloids going mental and the broadsheets melancholy. The sheer pressure on one injured man to race against time to get fit, and finally the ready excuse found in this lad’s rueful and unfortunate outing coinciding with a forgettable exit.
It’s England’s own quadrennial apocalypse. But don’t blame the watching world, everyone likes a faltering Achilles and a good doomsday story.
Shivani is an assistant editor based in Mumbai
shivani.naik@expressindia.com