Valentine’s Day special: Gift ideas for your partner according to their love language

“When it comes to love, the fundamental truth is that people speak different love languages. Similar to the native tongue we pick up from our parents and siblings, we grow up picking our emotional love language in those formative years. The secret to long-lasting love is to speak and understand these love languages of our partners.” says Tanni Choudhury, a faculty member at Jindal Institute of Behavioural Sciences who has conceptualised and created courses on “Intimacy in Digital Age”, and “Psychology of Modern Love: Making Good Decisions for Better Relationships”.

Here are some gifting ideas based on your partner’s love language.

Words of Affirmation

Words of Affirmation mean those verbal compliments or words of appreciation that are best expressed in simple, straightforward statements such as: “You look radiant in that dress” or “I really appreciate your washing the dishes tonight.” Choudhury suggests, “Some other ways that you could incorporate this love language is to use encouraging, kind, and humble words and keeping in mind the manner in which you speak to your partners while expressing these words of affirmation. Writing a love letter or setting a goal to compliment your partner every day for a month are other novel ways”.

Some gifting ideas: Post-it notes with special messages, an elaborate and honest love letter confessing your feelings, a small video of you talking about your feelings for them, a book of love poems or quotes, Conversation cards, or a piece of jewellery with a personalized message.

Quality Time

Quality time means undivided attention, togetherness, and quality conversation as central aspects of this love language. Choudhury explains, “When two individuals are sharing their needs, feelings, and desires in a sympathetic, friendly and uninterrupted way, you will achieve this powerful love language. Some quality activities that you can include are taking a walk together, and making a lunch/dinner appointment for your partner. The key is to create memories of love”.

Gifting ideas: going for a dinner date, going for a long drive, going for a weekend getaway, indulging in board games together, going for a hike.

Go on a date with your partner if their language is quality time. (Pic source: Movie still)

Receiving Gifts

Receiving Gifts as a primary love language symbolises thoughtfulness that speaks more loudly than a gift you hold in your hands. These set of people show their love and affection and feel loved when they are bestowed with gifts. “The idea is the thought expressed in securing the gift and giving it as an expression of love. Making a DIY gift for your partner or trying a parade of gifts are examples that you can incorporate into your romantic lives,” says Choudhury.

Gifting ideas: gift them something that they have been wanting for a long time, gift them something sentimental, gift them something based on their personality and likes

Acts of Service

Acts of Service as a love language centre around willingness to do activities that help share the responsibilities of everyday life of your partner. These are individual actions you perform and about expressing affection through actions. “One way you can include if this is your partner’s love language is by making a list of requests your partner has made and selecting one of those every week to do it as an expression of love,” suggests Choudhury.

Gifting ideas: make them a home-cooked meal, clean up the house for them, help them with their chores, do their duties for a week

Physical Touch

Physical touch includes hand-holding, embracing, and kissing as ways of communicating emotional love to your partner. It could include simple implicit love touches such as putting your hand on your partner’s shoulder as you pour a cup of tea. “In a time of crisis, physical touch is a powerful communicator of love where we need to feel loved more than anything. It indicates that you care and provides a unique opportunity for expressing love. Reaching out to hold your partner’s hand, and giving a hug when your partner arrives at home are some ways to incorporate this love language,” says Choudhury.

Gifting ideas: Massage coupon, long-distance touch bracelets, a cosy blanket, shower your partner with hugs and kisses

“Once you identify and learn to speak your partner’s primary love language, your need for intimacy and love is met. Adults long to feel affection and secure in healthy loving relationships, and hence it is crucial to recognize such emotional health in our lives,” concludes Choudhury.

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