For too long, too much of culture has been in the grip of metaphor, based on a misunderstanding of how social dynamics operate among social mammals. Since at least the second half of the last century, a crass social Darwinism has wormed its way into pop culture, backed by pseudo-science. Boys and men have been sold the myth of the “alpha male” — aggressive, domineering and with predatory undertones — as being at the top of the social pyramid. Beta males, on the other hand, are weak creatures, more social than aggressive. These misconceptions were based on studies of wolves and, more importantly, simian cousins of homo sapiens such as chimpanzees and gorillas. As it turns out, primates were setting a better example all along.
Research based on 20 years of data on gorillas in Rwanda, published in the Royal Society Journal Proceedings B on August 6, shows how females, even when they move between social groups, search for and maintain friendships. Most primates change groups and locations, likely as a defence against inbreeding. New members are usually at the bottom of the hierarchy and can face aggression and ostracisation from more established, dominant females. Rather than aggression, however, they rely on past ties with other females, some of whom they have not seen since childhood. And the “friendly females” build more enduring ties and provide more safety than alpha males do.
This latest piece of research is of a piece with a growing body of work that shows that social skills, empathy, grooming, etc, are far more important in achieving status and success among primates. Bonobos, genetically as close to humans as chimps, are known as the “loving ape” because of how non-violent they are. Even among chimpanzees, the dominant male is often the one with the most social and political skills — with brains rather than brawn. Perhaps it’s time that humans emulate the reality of the friendly females rather than the myth of the alpha male.
