Neliima Azeem on her relationship with son Shahid Kapoor: ‘He was with me every step of the way’

Neliima says that the passion for dance helped her sail through the ebb and flow of life. “I started as a child. I must have been three of four when my father came to Mumbai, he was the editor of Blitz, and then we shifted to Delhi where I learnt Kathak from Smt Uma Sharma’s school. However, I started seriously pursuing dance in the late 70’s. Once I was with Maharaj ji from the age of eleven, it was like my dream came true. There was a long journey with him. I’d say we’ve been learning from Maharaj ji for the last fifty years; I have been a student all my life. I was passionately into dance, there was a time in my life when I would get great offers from big productions but I was so dedicated to my dancing that I turned down many acting opportunities as gracefully as I could.”

Talking of challenges and tough turns, Neliima has seen her fair share. Her marriages with actor Pankaj Kapur, Rajesh Khatter and vocalist Raza Ali Khan didn’t last but Neliima says that her parents gave her the much needed cushioning thanks to which she could continue her work and fend for her children.

“Though my marriages broke up, my parents were so amazing and so supportive that there wouldn’t be a better cushioning for me to recover. I went back to my dancing and Shahid (son, actor Shahid Kapoor) was always with me wherever I went. And later when I shifted back to Mumbai after doing Phir Wahi Talash, which became a stepping stone for me and helped me return to films and television. It was a whole new chapter in my life, it taught me so much. When I was in Delhi, I was in an enclosed cocoon; but in Mumbai I saw so many challenges that, as a human being, I would say I learnt, fell, I got up, I walked again. It all happened here. All I can say is that it’s been a crazy ride and the best part about it were my parents and my family, largely my children. And today my child’s children, my grandchildren make such a beautiful part of my life. Despite having gone through difficult phases, I’ve seen huge challenges, break ups and break downs, that it’s been a roller-coaster ride, but by the end of the day I’d say that I’ve had a very enriched life.” Neliima shares.

Talking of son Shahid, she says that he has been with her every step of the way. “I had a lot happening at a very early age. I had a beautiful career in dance and in theatre, and then I married young and became a mother at a young age. I was just stepping out of girlhood and it was the most beautiful phase, when Shahid came.”

Shahid Kapoor and Neliima Azeem

When asked if the industry’s outlook has changed towards female actors who struggle in their personal lives, as they’re under constant scrutiny, Neliima says, “I didn’t really have the time to assimilate what lens people were looking at me with. I didn’t give attention to it very honestly. I’ve always been immersed in everything that I think is very important to me, whether it comes to my family or friends or my work. So I don’t get very affected with how people see me. But I’ve also been very fortunate that every time I turned around, things improved. So I just see it (the struggle period) as something that made me the person who I am today.”

Ishaan Khatter and mother Neelima Azeem were present at the premiere of Cirque du Soleil Bazzar. (Source: Varinder Chawla)

Neliima then opens up about how she’s always taken the scrutiny against her in her stride, and remembers the advice veteran filmmaker Mahesh Bhatt had given her. “Bhatt saab would say ‘better to be infamous than to be unknown’. When you choose to be in a field that is going to be under scrutiny, one can’t be cribbing about it because you know what you have chosen.”