Admitting she prefers a quiet exit, Shalini Passi reveals her go-to excuse: ‘I tell them I am going to the washroom

During a recent conversation with The Chill Pod, the Delhi socialite shared, “My friends were having dinner, and I told them I went to the washroom. I don’t tell them I am leaving. I just leave. But now my friends have caught on, so if I tell them I am going to the washroom, they will be like ‘you are leaving’. They’ll be like, ‘Take my phone’ or something.'”

But why do people do it?

Dr Jyoti Kapoor, founder-director and senior psychiatrist at Manasthali, Gurugram, explained that ghosting is an emotionally hurtful and manipulative move, leaving the other person confused and uncertain about their intentions and the fate of the relationship

While the reasons for ghosting may vary, for some it can stem from a lack of emotional availability, and for others from fear of confrontation and emotionally charged conversations. “There can also be a lack of interest at play, and ghosting is a result of passively showing disinterest,” Kapoor said.

 

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Whatever the reason, according to Kapoor, ghosting is an immature way to deal with relationships. “It often triggers feelings of abandonment or rejection, confusion and self-doubt, low self-esteem, loss of trust, and a negative impact on mental health for those on the receiving end of such disrespectful treatment,” she said.

When it comes to leaving parties silently, the first and foremost reason is avoiding long goodbyes. Saying goodbye can take forever, especially if you know many people. “A quiet exit is a blessing for introverts, those with anxiety, or those who think goodbyes can feel overwhelming. It also helps to keep the mood light,” she said, adding that sometimes it feels better to leave on a high note, rather than wind down into awkwardness. After a long day of work and socialising, when your battery is almost dead, and you just want to jump in bed and call it a day, leaving without notice is the best gift you can give yourself.

But what about party and social etiquette?

If you have been invited to a party, you have to play your cards right. “When the party is large, located at a bar and people are busy mingling, it’s okay if you make a silent exit. In certain work functions, staying too long can look odd. Weigh your options and make a move. And if you find your host busy or distracted, give yourself permission to leave the party behind,” said the expert.

And when should you stay and say bye? When the gathering is small and intimate, your close friends are hosts, it is a family event or a dinner party with less than 10 people in attendance — or if the host specifically asks to let you know before leaving.