Kohrra actor Barun Sobti on why men fear strong women: ‘Forget taking orders…’

“She is described as rigid, dominating, or unsuitable for marriage. This labelling serves a social function, preserving male centrality while quietly shifting the burden of adjustment onto women. Over time, female autonomy is interpreted not as psychological maturity, but as relational failure,” explained Raj.

 

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A lot of this has got to do with early social conditioning. Men’s expectations of control within marriage get influenced by observing how women absorb emotional strain, while men continue to retain decision-making authority. “Even in progressive households, he says, final control often rests with men,” said Raj.

As adults, many men equate stability with dominance and intimacy with predictability. Marriage then becomes the space where these assumptions are enacted: women are evaluated for flexibility, men for earning capacity.

“The emotional cost of this conditioning is significant. Men who have not learnt to share power often struggle with intimacy, adaptability, and emotional regulation, though this is rarely recognised as a relational issue. Equality feels destabilising not because it is threatening, but because it was never modelled as safe,” elaborated Raj.

But the truth of the matter is that patriarchy harms men as much as women, limiting their capacity for vulnerability, conflict resolution, and deeper connection.

Dr Anjalika Atrey, a psychiatrist, sexologist and de-addiction specialist in Mumbai, says that today, women are far more emotionally aware and boundary-conscious, allowing them to recognise this imbalance sooner and reject the normalisation of burnout. “Women often suppress their own needs to keep everything functioning, which leads to chronic emotional exhaustion, anxiety, irritability, emotional numbness, and a loss of desire,” she shared.

“Women today are more self-aware, financially independent, and socially supported than previous generations. They have greater exposure to therapy, wellness culture, and language that helps them detect imbalance early. When a woman realises she’s functioning as her partner’s therapist, planner, mother, and emotional regulator, she experiences what we call relationship fatigue,” she told indianexpress.com.

DISCLAIMER: This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to.