Actor Bobby Deol recently reflected on one of the toughest phases of his life and the lessons he learnt from it. Speaking at the International Indian Film Academy (IIFA) Awards, Deol said that losing faith in yourself during difficult times can be dangerous.
“Jab bura waqt aata hai agar aapko apne upar bharosa nahi hai… to aap kabhi kamyab ho nahi sakte,” he said. (If you don’t have faith in yourself during hard times, you’ll never succeed.)
He added that many people begin feeling sorry for themselves, wondering why their talent or hard work isn’t being recognised. “Aap give up kar dete hain, apne aap pe rote hain, apne haal pe rone lagte hain, pity karte ho apne aap ko (You give up, you cry on yourself, you lament your condition, you pity yourself).”
According to Deol, this can lead people towards things that offer temporary comfort but eventually become difficult to break free from. Deol’s comments raise an important question: Can a lack of self-belief during hard times increase a person’s risk of addiction?
DISCLAIMER: This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to. Always consult your health practitioner before starting any routine.
More complex than simply lacking confidence
Psychiatrists say there is definitely some truth in what Deol is describing, although addiction is far more complex than simply lacking confidence.
“During difficult phases of life, people who feel helpless, hopeless, or incapable of handling challenges are more likely to look for quick relief from emotional pain,” says Dr Anjalika Atrey, Psychiatrist, Sexologist, and De-addiction Specialist.
“This relief may come through alcohol, drugs, gambling, excessive social media use, shopping, or other compulsive behaviours,” the psychiatrist points out, agreeing with Deol’s theory.
According to Dr Atrey, self-belief plays an important protective role. “Self-belief acts like a psychological buffer. When people believe they can cope, adapt, and recover, they are more likely to seek solutions rather than escape,” she says. “On the other hand, chronic self-doubt can increase vulnerability to avoidance behaviours and unhealthy coping mechanisms.”
Surg Commodore (Dr) Sunil Goyal (Retd), Senior Consultant-Psychiatry, Sarvodaya Hospital, Faridabad, further weighs in, pointing out that psychological research also points in a similar direction.
“When one begins to lose faith in oneself, lacks hope, and feels helpless to change one’s situation, a person will seek out temporary relief from the emotional pain one is feeling,” Dr Goyal says.
He explains that the problem is that the brain can gradually start associating these behaviours with relief and reward, increasing the likelihood of dependency over time.
Not a character flaw or failure of willpower
Psychiatrists agree with Bobby Deol’s proposition that family support can create an environment where recovery becomes more possible. (Image: Facebook/Bobby Deol)
Experts stress that low self-belief alone does not cause addiction. “That said, addiction is not a character flaw or a failure of willpower. Genetics, mental health conditions, trauma, stress, environment, and availability of substances all play important roles,” says Dr Atrey. “Many highly successful and confident individuals also struggle with addiction.”
Dr Goyal similarly notes that addiction is a complex biopsychosocial condition influenced by multiple factors, including genetics, mental health, traumatic experiences, family environment, social influences, and access to help.
Can family support help someone recover?
In the same conversation, Deol credited his family for helping him regain perspective and focus on improving himself.
Doctors say family support is one of the strongest protective factors during recovery. “When individuals feel loved, accepted, and supported rather than judged or shamed, they are more likely to seek help, stay engaged in treatment, and regain hope,” says Dr Atrey, adding that a caring family can provide emotional stability, encouragement, accountability, and a sense of belonging.
“For many people, knowing that someone believes in them becomes a powerful motivation to change,” he says, just like in Deol’s case.
However, experts caution that family support alone is not always enough. “Addiction is a medical and psychological condition that often requires structured treatment, lifestyle changes, relapse prevention strategies, and sometimes medication.”
Where recovery often begins
One of the most important lessons is learning to face discomfort instead of escaping from it. According to Dr Atrey, this is when they build psychological strength.
“Recovery often begins when a person starts believing that change is possible and that they are capable of taking the next step forward,” he says. “The most successful recoveries usually happen when personal motivation and professional treatment work hand in hand with family support.”
As Dr Atrey puts it, “Love may not be the entire treatment, but it is often the reason someone decides to begin the journey toward recovery in the first place.”
DISCLAIMER: This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to. Always consult your health practitioner before starting any routine.
Bobby Deol believes that self pity can pave the way to addiction (Image: Express Archive) 
Psychiatrists agree with Bobby Deol’s proposition that family support can create an environment where recovery becomes more possible. (Image: Facebook/Bobby Deol)
Share
