4 min readNew DelhiSep 5, 2023 12:00 PM IST
First published on: Sep 5, 2023 at 12:00 PM IST
If you’re a parent who can’t get their child to sleep in their own bed at night, you’re not alone. Convincing your child to sleep in their own bed can be a challenge once they have gotten into the habit of sleeping in your bed.
They might want another bedtime story, feel scared alone or sneak into your bed at the middle of the night. While you may want to coddle them and let them sleep in your bed, this might encourage unwanted behaviour or could become a bad habit in the future. But every problem has a solution. So, we turned to actor-influencer Roshni Chopra, who recently shared a few tips to get kids to sleep in their own room and stop them from wanting to jump into your bed every night.
First, she advised to get them their own bed that will give them a sense of independence and pride. You can buy some comfortable bed sheets and pillow sets to make the space according to their liking.
Second, make bedtime a ritual. “We love talking about our best and worst parts of the day and saying thank you for the simple things that make life beautiful. This helps them unwind and drift into slumber,” Chopra said.
Lastly, wait till they are just about to doze off, say goodnight and exit the room while they’re still awake, so they don’t wake up in the middle of the night trying to find you.
Concurring, Nishtha Grover, Child and Adolescent Psychologist said that Indian parenting is quite different from Western models of parenting as children here are often coddled for nourishment and nurturance for a significant period of time.
“Initially, sharing the same room while the child is an infant is easier for caregiving, however, as a child starts growing it’s essential for the parents to have personal space for a better spousal relationship and holistic development of the child,” she said.
To get your child to sleep in their own room, the expert advises to follow a gradually progressive pattern rather than an abrupt shift. Children are emotionally very perceptive of changes around them and making them comfortable will only smoothen the transition.
“The parents can begin with allowing the child to feel safe in their space by spending some time with them in their room. Slowly, once familiarity with a personal space is established, the parents can set up bedtime routines like storytelling or sharing how their day looked like,” she said. “Research has shown that sharing personal anecdotes or stories at bedtime strengthens attachment and allows the child to be confident about their future as they derive a sense of safety from their guardian’s assurance.”
Developing a set schedule for sleep automatically attunes the child’s memory to follow it strictly. (Source: Freepik)
Additionally, Grover said it’s vital to understand the importance of consistency in sleep patterns. “Developing a set schedule for sleep automatically attunes the child’s memory to follow it strictly. It would be even more effective if you share the same bedtime with your child as children learn exceptionally well through modelling that is observing their role models (often the parents in childhood) exhibiting the same behaviour that is expected of the child.”
Grover recommends that the child sleeps with the parent at least for an year, after which a cot can be placed in the parent’s room. However, children above the age of 3 or 4 should be encouraged to sleep by themselves.
“Research published in the National Center for Biotechnology Information (NCBI) concludes that when children develop the habit to sleep alone, they display higher self-worth, enhanced cognitive performance and decrease the likelihood of developing fears of sleeping alone,” she said.
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Convincing your child to sleep in their own bed can be a challenge once they have gotten into the habit of sleeping in your bed. (Source: Freepik) 
Developing a set schedule for sleep automatically attunes the child’s memory to follow it strictly. (Source: Freepik)
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