Helicopter Eela actress Kajol, who played a controlling mom in the film, recently opened up on why she does not believe in hovering over her kids Nysa and Yug in real life.
Speaking to Kareena Kapoor on her show What Women Want, the mother-of-two said, “I am not that much of a controlling parent. I actually don’t believe that it is conducive to a healthy relationship.” The actress revealed how she was inspired by her mother Tanuja’s parenting approach. “My mother was a complete opposite of it. My mom literally gave the name ‘rebel upbringing’ to me. I was a very differently brought up child.”
Talking about how striking a “healthy balance” in one’s parenting style, she added, “There is a fine line between giving children a grid to grow up with and overwhelming them to a point that they can’t grow.” Ajay Devgn, on the other hand, was quite an “overwhelming presence” on his kids, revealed the celeb mom. “There is no chill and no cool where his kids are concerned. He wants to know everything,” she said.
Kajol was asked about why mothers tend to feel guilty when they have to leave their child behind and go to work. As a child, Kajol too would feel upset on seeing her mother go to work. She recalled, “I remember telling her [Tanuja] at one point that ‘Everybody else’s mother stays at home and they come to pick their kids up from school and my mother is the only one who does not come to pick me up from school.’ And she was like, ‘You know baby I have to work.’ I looked at her and I realised somewhere, may be as a child at that point of time I stopped resenting her….I think it [working mom’s guilt] is because of the responsibility factor. In societies generally, the responsibility is always the mother’s to bring up the child. And that’s where the guilt factor comes in.”
Talking about how her own experience of being a working mom, she shared, “My son came up to me and he was like, ‘Mom, why do you have to go to work?’ I was like, ‘You remember playtime? Nobody stops you from playtime…So this is my playtime and you have to let me go, with a nice happy face.”
Kajol also spoke about things she is learning from her children. “I am definitely picking up their habits in music…selfies and what looks good on Instagram,” she said. She also talked about the most important lesson she learnt from her son Yug. She spoke of an instance where Nysa refused to be present at a family event because she did not like it. While Kajol as the stern mother got her to finally sit with the other members, it was Yug who then told his mom she should not have scolded her daughter for speaking the truth. “That was huge,” the mom said.