From relatives, peers to books, everyone has a load of advice for parents to raise the “perfect” child. In a Ted Talk, professor of psychology and neuroscience Yuko Munakata spoke about how the parenting advice you receive can also turn out to be faulty.
“The problem is that parenting books send conflicting messages. The one consistent message is that if your child is not succeeding, you are doing something wrong. Science supports a totally different message,” she said.
“Children can be shaped by many forces that are often intertwined like successful parents, successful genes, successful peers and a culture of success that they grow up in,” the professor argued.
Everyone can’t possibly be right about how parenting works, given how wildly beliefs have varied, said Munakata. The same style of parenting can impact children of the same parent in different ways. “Your parenting can be shaping your children, just not in ways that would lead them to become more alike,” she said.
Parents have influence but they do not have control, the professor emphasised.
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