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Thursday, October 28, 2021

The zoozoo takes it all

Don’t you love the friendly fluid creatures that liven up the IPL?

Written by Shailaja Bajpai |
May 5, 2009 12:28:38 am

Who’s the best? The vest or the zoozoos? The zoozoos have it. They are the most entertaining and intelligent things on TV. Or so we thought until we learnt they’re not things at all but thin,young people transformed into TV commercials for Vodafone. Well,they could and have fooled us. Anyone who thinks those flat,white,elastic creatures without a bone or curve in their bodies are human,hasn’t seen the male or female form,lately.

Not that it matters. We love ‘em. So much so,we wish they would replace IPL (where the ads appear most often) as the main attraction. Zoozoos are inventive,unexpected; most IPL matches are predictable. We don’t know what zoozoos will do next; we’ve seen what’s happening most often in IPL. The team batting first has struggled but manfully put up a woefully low score so we switch channels only to be lured back by the sight of half of the team batting second being out halfway through and the last over deciding the match when,as commentators say,“We have a match on our hands”.

These days the commentators are working overtime to artificially resurrect the encounters. That’s when they’re not lolling in overgrown chairs around the ground sampling the local human delicacies,or they’re not merchandising for IPL. This is not what we expect from IPL. Nowadays,we can get 120 in 20 overs of a Test match — ask Virender Sehwag. In IPL we want the big hitters to hit it big time otherwise why are they there?

Zoozoos,meanwhile,are playing out scenes from the everyday life of a mobile phone in amusing ways,a cross between Casper and Pillsbury characters. Just now,they’re the most appealing personalities on TV,way ahead of TV anchors or politicians.

As for the vests,their numbers seem to increase in direct proportion to the heat. So the hotter it is,the more heated the election debate,the more frequently we see baniyan commercials. In the 2004 election,they played a very visible role in the election coverage too,with more than 15 brands advertised. What’s so fascinating about these tightly-knit garments from a sociological standpoint,is that their storyboards are either about male sexuality or male prowess (the same thing?) when you’d think men wear them to protect themselves from the heat and the dust and the sweat of the season — or the campaign,as the case may be. Zoozoos are so cool under the shower we saw them taking on Sunday,they don’t need undergarments.

In other news,saw Ritu Beri’s latest collection parade the ramp on models not a day younger than 65. This elderly look worked well although some models were unsteady on the catwalk. And,guess which channel? Aastha,that spiritual mall stop where Ramdev offers tips on growing old,gracefully and more gradually.

CNN-IBN calls its election coverage ‘100 billion votes’ — 714 million only,actually. But congratulate it for getting the PM’s parivar,last week,and the PM himself,this week,in exclusive interviews.

The latest from SRK’s corner is that in order to pay for his Knight Riders’ poor performance in South Africa,he’s having to play “the joker” at a wedding in Mumbai for Rs 2 crore — this on a Hindi news channel.

Meanwhile,the prize for the most paranoid response to the H1N1 influenza case on Headlines Today: ‘Bio-terrorism — how scared should we be?’ Farhan Akhtar made a reappearance (or maybe we were not looking) on something called Oye Kya Baat Hai (NDTV Imagine) where he met a succession of young women and was rejected by each one for nothing more serious than saying his hair was styled with lice — enough to bring Abhishek Bachchan that much closer to him. Well,at least it was funny.

shailaja.bajpai@expressindia.com

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