Journalism of Courage
Rani Mukerji on parents wanting her to marry young; how to build a fulfilling career
Rani Mukerji reflected on growing up with traditional gender expectations, revealing her parents had planned for her to marry young rather than work.
Rani Mukerji reflects on her early career | Source: PTI Photo by Vijay Kumar Joshi via Express Archives
In an earlier interview, actor Rani Mukerji reflected on how her journey into cinema was never part of the original plan. Speaking to filmmaker Karan Johar during a conversation at Yash Raj Films Studios, Rani looked back on her childhood, family circumstances, and the unexpected turn that shaped her career. Despite growing up in a film family — her father, Ram Mukherjee, was a filmmaker — she revealed that life at home was far from glamorous, with the family earning just enough to “make ends meet.”
Rani also shared that her parents had imagined a very different future for her. “I don’t think they even had dreams (for me),” she said, adding, “At the time we were growing up, it was never really something that occurred to my dad that I was going to work. It was (considered) more of a boy’s responsibility. That responsibility they saw through my brother. With me, it was very clear. They wanted to get me married at a very young age.” Her father, Ram Mukherjee, came from an illustrious film family and was best known for directing Leader, starring Dilip Kumar, yet Rani’s own entry into films happened unexpectedly.
DISCLAIMER: This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to.
Recalling how she landed her debut film Raja Ki Aayegi Baraat, Rani said, “Destiny had other plans for me.” She explained, “With the offer that came for Raja Ki Aayegi Baraat, my mum just told me, ‘Salim uncle is a family friend, and he has offered you a film. Why don’t you take it up?’” Looking back now, she believes there may have been another reason behind her mother’s decision. “I didn’t realise it then, that probably my mum was finding a way to make the financial situation in my house better. Because they knew that if I did well in this field, it would be good for us. But at that time, I didn’t see it from that angle,” she said.
How family expectations shape women’s ambitions
Dr Sakshi Mandhyan, psychologist and founder at Mandhyan Care, tells indianexpress.com, “The messages girls receive while growing up usually become the messages they later give themselves. If a young woman repeatedly hears that marriage is the ultimate milestone and everything else is secondary, she may begin to modify her own aspirations long before anybody asks her to.”
She mentions having come across many women who were academically bright and ambitious, “yet felt guilty for wanting more for themselves because somewhere they had learnt that personal ambition was selfish.” This can influence confidence, risk-taking, and even the ability to make independent decisions.
Thankfully, there has been a meaningful shift. Families today are far more encouraging of higher education and careers for daughters. “However, many women still find themselves negotiating between personal aspirations and social expectations. The challenge is no longer only about opportunity. It is also about helping women feel that choosing themselves does not mean rejecting their family,” notes Dr Mandhyan.
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Balancing financial realities with personal interests
Dr Mandhyan explains, “I rarely meet young adults who are thinking only about themselves when choosing a career. Most are carrying multiple voices in their head. I believe families can be supportive by having honest conversations instead of fixed expectations. A young person should be able to discuss interests, fears, strengths, and practical limitations without worrying that they are disappointing the family.”
In her experience, she says that young adults handle responsibility much better when they feel supported and not burdened by it. “It must be acknowledged that career decisions are rarely perfect. They evolve. Families that allow for exploration and course correction tend to raise more confident and resilient adults.”
Building a fulfilling career when life takes an unexpected turn
Click each section to discover how unexpected opportunities can shape a meaningful career.
🌱 Stay open to change
Career paths are rarely linear. Financial changes, moving cities or unexpected opportunities can lead to fulfilling work that was never part of the original plan.
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💡 Curiosity over rigidity
People often find meaningful careers because they remain curious instead of holding on rigidly to what they originally imagined for themselves.
🎯 A different way to measure success
Rather than asking, “Is this the career I planned?” ask, “Is there something here that I can contribute or grow from?” This mindset encourages learning and adaptability.
✅ Key takeaway
Careers are built through a series of experiences, decisions and course corrections. Sometimes the unexpected path becomes the one that leads to the greatest fulfilment.
DISCLAIMER: This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to.
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