4 min readNew DelhiNov 4, 2024 10:30 PM IST
First published on: Nov 4, 2024 at 10:30 PM IST
As more people embrace non-traditional family dynamics, they’re often faced with difficult questions from their children about their unique family structures.
Filmmaker Karan Johar recently opened up about his own worries as a single father. In a reunion interview for Netflix, reflecting on an emotional moment from the show Fabulous Lives vs Bollywood Wives where Neelam Kothari opened up about her divorce with businessman Rishi Sethia, Johar revealed, “My constant fear is that I also have to deal with those questions from my own children, about my circumstances and that I have a modern family situation.”
Discussing how he anticipates challenging questions from his children as they grow up, Johar added, “They will find out things, and I will have to be answerable. Being a single parent, I know I am answerable to my children about so many aspects.” As single parents and non-traditional families are becoming more common, parents like Johar are navigating ways to raise children who are emotionally intelligent and confident in their family identity.
Psychotherapist Malika Chandra emphasises that the first crucial step for single parents is validating their children’s feelings. “Quite often, single parents carry guilt about their unique situation and operate from that guilt by subconsciously shutting down their child’s difficult emotions or giving solutions or minimising their issue,” she tells indianexpress.com.
How can parents address complex questions about family structure?
Honest, age-appropriate communication is key, says Chandra. “Parents can show their vulnerabilities as well, without emotionally being enmeshed with their children.” She advises against villainising the other parent, adding that it’s important to help children understand that relationships can be complex and that they are not at fault for what has happened.
Several factors can impact children’s self-confidence in non-traditional families (Source: Freepik)
Building emotional intelligence in non-traditional families
Chandra outlines several strategies to foster emotional resilience:
- Building children’s emotional vocabulary and helping them understand their feelings
- Teaching healthy coping mechanisms while educating about potential unhealthy alternatives
- Encouraging individual identity while celebrating the family unit
- Creating a safe space for children while maintaining a balanced approach to freedom
Challenges unique to single-parent households
Chandra explains that several factors can impact children’s self-confidence in nontraditional families. The media portrayal of ideal families and family structures can create additional pressure, she says, adding that single parents often face resource constraints in terms of time, finances, and energy compared to two-parent households.
“They are often playing the part of both parents. Therefore, there may be fewer balancing forces and not another person to bounce opinions off of or reduce their stress when times get difficult,” she elaborates.
The importance of open dialogue
Chandra emphasises that open communication is crucial for all family structures. “This helps leave less room for assumptions which can begin to internalise as beliefs if not addressed at the right time,” she explains.
She notes that unresolved parental guilt, though normal, can directly impact children’s self-confidence and parent-child relationships. Additionally, “uncomfortable questions and assumptions from others outside of the family can directly impact self-confidence.”
By implementing these strategies and maintaining open dialogue, single parents can help their children develop strong emotional intelligence and confidently embrace their unique family dynamics, creating a positive and nurturing environment for growth.
Filmmaker Karan Johar recently opened up about his own worries as a single father. (Photo: Karan Johar/Instagram) 
Several factors can impact children’s self-confidence in non-traditional families (Source: Freepik)
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