‘Meri Marzi’: Smriti Irani on being questioned for returning to television and practically all decisions of her life

Irani recalled a reporter asking her why she was returning to acting. The witty leader confidently replied, “Meri Marzi (It’s my choice).” She revealed that she was similarly questioned at each stage of her life.

Smriti says that when she clearly tells people that its her choice, they’d label her “ghamandi” (Image: Instagram/Smriti Irani)

“Pehle kehte the naukri kyu nahi kar rahi, ab keh rahe hain naukri kyu kar rahi hai. Pehle kehte the arrey actor ko mantri ko kyu banaya. Ab keh rahe hain arrey Smriti Irani ko mantri kyu nhi banaya” (Earlier they asked why you are not doing a job, how they are saying why are you doing a job. Previously, they said why did you make an actor a minister. Now they have a problem with why Smriti Irani was not made a minister.)

Laughingly, she said that people should toss a coin and finally let her know what they actually want her to do. “Ye chit bhi meri pat bhi meri nahi chalega (You cannot have it both ways).”

The psychological impact on constant scrutiny

Irani’s remarks highlight the relentless scrutiny public figures endure—where every action, even those suggested by the media earlier, becomes a topic of debate.

Sneha Shivarajan, consultant psychologist at Good Wave Foundation, explains that constant questioning can lead to hypervigilance and decision fatigue.

“Individuals under persistent scrutiny may spend significant mental energy justifying every action,” Shivarajan notes. Over time, this can make people question their reality and feel a loss of personal agency.

Dr Naveen Kumar Dhagudu, senior consultant psychiatrist at Yashoda Hospitals, Hyderabad, agrees with this and adds that ongoing public judgment can lead to heightened anxiety, stress, and diminished self-esteem.

“Continuous comparison and fear of criticism disturb emotional stability, weaken inner strength, and may even trigger irritability or depression.”

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Figuring Out with Raj Shamani (@figuringout.co) 

What Smriti’s confidence resonates

The actor’s confident responses to such questioning are a deliberate strategy to reclaim control and protect one’s sense of identity.

“By asserting their right to choose, individuals draw boundaries against intrusive scrutiny and preserve emotional energy,” says Dr Shivarajan. Dr Dhagudu adds that such statements reinforce autonomy, reduce vulnerability, and protect self-esteem.

How to stay sane amidst  this questioning noise

Dr Shivarajan and Dr. Dhagudu recommend following ways to maintain mental balance amidst relentless questioning:

• Limit exposure to negative media or social platforms.
• Cultivate strong offline support systems with friends and family.
• Practice mindfulness, stress management, and therapy to separate self-worth from public opinion.
• Focus on internal values rather than seeking external validation.

For Smriti Irani, the mantra of “meri marzi” is more than defiance—it’s a conscious effort to protect mental health, preserve autonomy, and assert dignity, even under constant public gaze. As psychologists note, establishing such boundaries is key to maintaining confidence and emotional resilience in the face of scrutiny.

DISCLAIMER: This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to.