Today, most married women and those women who have attained “marriageable” age in India, will abandon food and water till the moon makes an appearance. All for the sake of the long life of their husbands. I’ve never figured out how how these variables are related and I do not want to delve into the science of it, but as per the education provided to us by Karan Johar and Aditya Chopra, this fasting business a.k.a. Karva Chauth is #marriagegoals in India.
I am not married, but given the rate at which uncles and aunties interfere in my personal life, I can tell I definitely fall into the “marriageable age” category. Which explains why the aunties in my building ask me, “So, fasting this year, haan?”.
Despite these ladies asking me whether or not I am fasting and giving me the evil eye for saying “no”, I have some advice for them. Why don’t they join their husbands in chomping on all kinds of delicacies throughout the day? After all, eating together spreads love and strengthens your bond with your partner.
Maybe, step out with your lover or husband and enjoy a long walk and a good meal. I don’t know whether this will guarantee a long life, given the kind of smog that surrounds us, but you will definitely end up leading a life full of love and free of hanger (that would be hunger and anger).
While all the other parts about this festival make some sense – dressing up like you are about to audition for a Bollywood production, donning all the gold jewellery that was wasting away in the cupboard- this idea of putting a ban on your hunger and thirst to prove your love for your husband makes little sense.
That being said, there are other ways (read: better ways) to prove your love for your other half and make sure your husband lives a long life – like buy him an anti-pollution mask, get him a gym subscription, sign him up for a quarterly health check-up – and most importantly, eat. Preferably, together.
But then again, the Karan Johar school of romance has wired us in ways that always repel logic. The Bollywood kind of love somehow rarely likes to hang out with reasoning and rationality. So, while I enjoy my full course meal, you can carry on with your expression of love by hating on food for a whole day just so your husband lives longer. I mean he most probably will, because he’s at least eating, right?