‘Life jeeta hai aapne hisaab se’: Arshad Warsi reveals why Akshaye Khanna ‘doesn’t care about you’; expert on psychology behind being truly unbothered

Stripped of celebrity context, these statements touch on something many people aspire to: emotional independence, clear boundaries, and the ability to live without being constantly affected by external opinions. 

An expert perspective helps unpack what this attitude really means and how to apply it in everyday life.

Psychological traits or coping mechanisms at play

Sonal Khangarot, licensed rehabilitation counsellor and psychotherapist, The Answer Room, tells indianexpress.com, “When someone appears completely unbothered by others’ opinions, several psychological dynamics may be at play. It can reflect emotional resilience, where a strong internal sense of self reduces dependence on external validation. In other cases, it may indicate emotional numbing or detachment, often developed as a coping mechanism after repeated hurt or criticism.” 

She adds that some individuals learn to stop caring as a way to protect themselves from disappointment. It may also point to avoidant patterns, where emotional distance feels safer than vulnerability. The distinction lies in flexibility; healthy resilience allows connection, while numbing often limits emotional depth.

How can individuals learn to live ‘life on their own terms’?

Living life on your own terms doesn’t mean shutting people out; it means choosing alignment over approval. Khangarot mentions, “Psychologically, this involves developing self-trust while staying emotionally open. Individuals can do this by pausing before reacting to feedback, asking, ‘Is this useful or just noise?’ rather than dismissing it entirely.”

Healthy autonomy allows discomfort without defensiveness and reflection without self-blame. Emotional avoidance shows up as rigidity, whereas secure independence looks flexible and grounded. 

Daily habits or mindset shifts that can help people reduce anxiety around judgment

Reducing anxiety around judgment starts with shifting focus from impression management to internal regulation. 

“Mindfulness and journaling can expose approval-seeking patterns without shame. Reframing judgment as information rather than evaluation reduces threat perception. It’s also helpful to build tolerance for mild disapproval by not correcting every misunderstanding. Over time, self-worth rooted in values and consistency reduces the need for PR-like self-presentation and external validation,” concludes Khangarot.