‘It feels really good NOT to be in LA’: Sitar maestro Anoushka Shankar reveals why she skipped the Grammys this year; the mental cost of chasing recognition

Instead of attending the ceremony, Anoushka chose to remain in India, aligning her decision with her personal values. “This year, I made a conscious decision not to go and to be on the road in India during the ceremony. I wanted to practice what I preach, which is that awards don’t matter like the actual connection playing music for people affords us as artists.” She also openly addressed the mental health impact of the process surrounding such events, writing, “I wanted to take care of my mental health too – and I have to say, sometimes the process of spending literally thousands of dollars on the privilege of flying, attending, marketing and getting sucked in to the machine, hugely anxious about outfits and red carpets, starting to hope to win and then not winning (again and again!) can take a toll.”

Choosing presence over prestige, Anoushka described her time in India as grounding and meaningful. “Being here in India, where Chapter III really began, working and laughing and playing with my incredible band and crew, is the stuff of reality, of my TRUEST artistic life,” she wrote, while wishing “luck and love to everyone nominated tonight.”

This perspective echoes a broader conversation around validation and self-worth—one that many people outside creative fields can also relate to. Long before this, actor Aamir Khan had publicly discussed how his views on awards had evolved. Early in his career, he admitted, “When it comes to awards, it’s the jury who decides it, and whatever they decide, it’s their prerogative. And every actor aims to win awards, I also strive for that, so perhaps in the future I might also win an award.” He added, “But yes, awards do act as a source of encouragement, it inspires you to do better work, you feel respected.”

Over time, his stance hardened. While promoting Dangal, he stated, “Commercial film awards are of no value to me. For me, Dangal has already got its biggest award, which is the love of the audience.” When asked if his view might change, he replied, “I don’t think so it will ever change.”

Together, these reflections raise larger questions about ambition, recognition and mental health.

But why do external markers of success often carry such a high psychological cost?

Counselling psychologist Athul Raj tells indianexpress.com, “External markers of success are public, comparative and unstable. Awards and recognition put people in constant comparison, which activates threat systems in the brain—fear of losing status, relevance, or belonging. Even confident, accomplished individuals aren’t immune, because the pressure isn’t about skill; it’s about identity. When success becomes something that must be repeatedly proven, the nervous system stays on alert.” 

 

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He continues, “Add visibility, judgment, social media amplification and expectations from family or industry, and achievement stops being nourishing. It becomes performative. In Indian contexts, where success is often tied to family pride and moral worth, the cost is even greater. You’re not just succeeding for yourself – you’re carrying symbolic weight.”

Distinguishing between healthy ambition and achievement-driven stress

Healthy ambition feels expansive; achievement-driven stress feels constrictive. Raj notes that one is driven by interest and meaning, the other by fear — of falling behind, disappointing others, or becoming irrelevant. “A key marker is how the body responds. With healthy ambition, effort is tiring but restorative. With harmful stress, there is chronic exhaustion, irritability, sleep disruption and a shrinking sense of self outside work.” 

“Another signal is rigidity,” states Raj, adding that when rest feels like failure, when outcomes matter more than learning, when self-worth rises and falls with results, ambition has crossed into threat mode. Psychological health declines not because goals are high, but because the inner cost is silently ignored.