April 12, 2013 2:29:04 am
My wife was crestfallen and I was shocked when my son told us he would never marry a girl. My 28-year old son said he is gay, recalls the 57-year-old father who eventually came to terms with his sons sexual preference but still feels sad about it.
A 62-year-old widow,who lives with her two sons,took it in her stride when her 35-year-old son working with an MNC disclosed he was gay. The mother says: It is his life. What can I say?
These are among other parents with gay children whose interviews have been recorded for the first time in Marathi in Manachiye Gunti (Samalingi Mulancha Palakancha Atmakatha),which is an account of parents of gay children. Published by Samapathik Trust,the book tells parents how to deal with their childrens sexuality.
Bindumadhav Khire,president of Samapathik Trust,a sexual health organisation working with gays,lesbians,transgenders and intersex community on their health and advocacy issues,says he decided to write the book in Marathi to assist parents in getting the correct medical and legal information.
Best of Express Premium
Parents have no support system when confronted with their childs sexuality. They have a lot of questions but no one to talk to, says Khire.
Dr Bhooshan Shukla,child and adolescent psychiatrist who has given his views in the book,says parents and society need to understand that homosexuality is a natural variant of sexuality.
The international scientific community had accepted that it is not a disease that needs a cure, says Shukla who has counselled several parents on how to accept their childs sexuality.
Finally,after several counselling sessions,I have to tell anxious parents that getting the boy married would be a case of outright cheating,lead to several complications between two families and eventually discredit their son. Parents finally understand this and try to respect their son or daughters wishes, Shukla adds.
Khire points out that parents are naturally wary of relatives or neighbours learning about their sons sexuality and also worry about their childs future.
The 57-year-old father is one of those who has a different perception of the issue. He says,Why cant I treat my sons sexuality as just a case of a child being left-handed instead of right-handed?
On the matter of homosexuals being harassed by police,Bhanupratap Barge,senior police inspector who is in charge of the social security department of Pune police,says awareness programmes by police have brought about a change.
There are fewer complaints of homosexuals being harassed by cops, he claims.
🗞 Subscribe Now: Get Express Premium to access our in-depth reporting, explainers and opinions 🗞️
- The Indian Express website has been rated GREEN for its credibility and trustworthiness by Newsguard, a global service that rates news sources for their journalistic standards.