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Thursday, January 23, 2020

Forwarded as Received: How Other Half Lives

WhatsApp Uncle imagines what it is to be a woman

Written by Aakash Joshi | Updated: September 8, 2019 6:11:24 am
WhatsApp Uncle, indianexpress, SundayEYE, patriarchy, EYE 2019, kalidas, tulsidas, anniversary, dreams, Two to tango: Equality begins at home

My family… let me tell u all something very frankly i have learned today… U R NEVER TOO OLD TO LEARN… All arrogance is negative… all ghamand takes us all far away from saatvic and Bharatiya way of life…

Neha, my granddaughter, apple of my eye, pineapple of my ears… u shud not have guroor over ur beauty… all boys will give u compliments… say hey there lady, u r raat kali and have come in my khwaab (ur very own daadi i seri-naded with this song:))) hee hee… daadu was also naughty:))))) BUT U SHOULD NOT BE HEADFUL AND PROUDY ABOUT IT….

Same with u swastik… u toh think becoz u read libtard books and do all tweeting u know all???? u think becoz of English knowledge u can laugh at ppl who have all Bharatiya knowledge but cannot tell differnce between hamlet and hari singh?!!!! Do u know difference between Kalidas and Tulsidas?!!! No!!! but u will make fun of all of us who cant say all fancy english words….

I can say about bahu also,…. BUT TODAY I WONT MY FAMILY… Yes… Today I also have learnt something U WILL NOT BELIEVE… me … Joshi ji… Karta of this parivaar… head of this vansh… IS PATRIARCHY SUPPORTER….

U may not have noticed my family,,, but ur daadi i toh hardly ever talk about…. Yesterday was wedding ki saalgirah… 52 years of marriage !!!!!!! I came home with gift also…. photo of me as young man, so handsome… in bush shirt and bell bottom…. BUT MRS WAS CRYING….

Bachhon…. all lyf she has been beautiful for me… made delicious foods… spent time with Nithalla ungrateful family.,… I toh have done nothing…. SO THIS ANNIVERSARY GIFT I GAVE HER… One… i promised no talk of adarniya Pradhan Mantri vikas purush sarvasansar ashwamedhi chakravartin Hindu hriday samrat Narendra bhai Modi ji and Senapati Loh Purush uniter of india destroyer of ghuspathi adarniya Griha Mantri Amit bhai Shah ji… TO STOP TEARS OF BEAUTIFUL MRS I WOULD DO ANYTHING… Like Ram went to hunt golden deer for Maiyya Sita, I said for u i will do all u do for me…

Bachchon.., cooking is very hard …. kitchen toh did not even have fan and ur daadi did not say but my boiled egg was not swadisht like her chicken curry… then i did washing… talking to maids and no one even said shaabaash Joshiji shaabaash… BUT worst toh was all grooming…

Beta Angad… SwaSTIK…. do u know what all ladies have to do? So many tel, cream, wax and lotion… they r smelling like gulaab not by accident…for ladies toh even toilet is dangerous… in shop when i asked for gents hygiene private washing, THEY ALL LAUGHED!!! Young whippersnappers gave me dirty looks!! Is hygiene bad thing?? Are aged people not to care for MRS? My family… Modiji talked of toilet ffrom red fort and we have swachh bharat!!!! ALL THIS SHARAM AND MAKING FUN IS WRONG?!!! All must be caring for each other, husband and wife…Like DDLJ hero, we all should do Karva Chauth.

Beta swastik, U also angad… it is time we do cooking and cleaning and all other things equally… ONLY THEN WILL REAL NEW INDIA COME… After all, if at home there is no equality, how can we become country of quality?!!!

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