When Anupam Kher would escort senselessly drunk Mahesh Bhatt home, director says he gave up alcohol after sensing ‘deep sense of rejection’ from daughter

Filmmaker Mahesh Bhatt has never been one to mince words about his personal missteps, and in a chat with Anupam Kher on The Anupam Kher some years ago, he spoke frankly about being an alcoholic in his youth, and the day he decided to quit drinking. The filmmaker said that he was angry, dissatisfied and impatient as a person, and he vented this frustration by drinking too much.

Reminded of his former self by his Saaransh actor, who told him that he was filled with rage and would often be so drunk that he’d need Anupam to drop him home, the filmmaker said in Hindi, “When a man is dissatisfied with himself, he is dissatisfied with the world. I was dissatisfied with myself. I knew I hadn’t achieved my potential. I was impatient. But filmmakers can’t hide who they are; the truth always shows on screen. Raj Khosla used to say that a filmmaker becomes naked through his fictional stories.”

Also read | Mahesh Bhatt recalls passing out on the road, realising he was an ‘alcoholic’: ‘My face was on the concrete’

Asked about the exact day that he decided to give up alcohol, he said, “My daughter Shaheen had just been born, and I continued to drink for a couple of days after her birth. When she came home, I picked her up in my arms, and I felt that she turned her face away from me. I sensed a deep sense of rejection, and I promised myself I wouldn’t drink again. I stopped drinking 26 years ago, and I haven’t had a drop since.”

Mahesh Bhatt has addressed the ups and downs of his life in his semi-autobiographical films, said that his film Daddy was inspired by his alcoholism. In the same chat, he also confessed that he is a lonely person, but said that his loneliness fuels his creativity. The filmmaker has been semi-retired for several years; he emerged from a two-decade long sabbatical to direct Sadak 2 in 2020, but hasn’t helmed a project since.