Aamir Khan’s daughter Ira Khan on Wednesday night took to her Instagram page to share her battle with depression and feeling burnt out after she recently “started to regain some stability in my life, and normalcy”.
Ira has been quite vocal about the importance of mental health. She had earlier shared that she was diagnosed with clinical depression over four years ago. She has also shared many videos about her mental health battle and in her latest post, she talked about how her “depression manifests itself” and how, when a situation arises, things get piled up and she “crashes.”
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In a long candid video, Ira spoke about striving to find a balance in her life and coping with depression. She said, “A few weeks ago I started to feel better from burn out, at least I started to regain some stability in my life, and normalcy. And, I was talking to someone and I was like — even now there is a part in me that doesn’t believe, that thinks that I’m overreacting, and it’s because of the way my depression manifests itself. I don’t harm myself, I don’t do drugs, I don’t have loads of coffee, I don’t have immediate threats to my life, that’s not how my depression manifests.”
The 24-year-old also spoke about her tendency to “pile up stuff” until she “crashes”, being the actual cause of her feeling a burn out. She said, “So, when I start to feel okay, I over work, or when I am upset I don’t tell anyone. Because of that, I start to pile up stuff and finally it gets too much and I crash. Then I start feeling better, then I crash. I couldn’t explain it until this time when I crashed. Then that part of me shuts up and only the part of me that is vulnerable, that wants to take care of itself, wants to get better is left. And that part now is broken, and that’s why it is crying.”
Ira then went on to stating how, once she feels better, she starts pushing herself again and the cycle of burn out continues. Ira also shared that she spoke to her therapist about it. She said, “I spoke to my therapist and I was like I do think to myself. This is not going to be my last burn out, I am going to do it again, but I am trying hard to not. But by the time I was talking to her, I was starting to feel better, so that part of myself started to defend itself, because actually I like that part of me on some level. It is a practical side of me. It pushes me to improve, do better and keeps me grounded. I am assuming that this is the part of me that doesn’t let me play victim unnecessarily.”
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While trying to figure out how to bring the balance back to her life with the help of her therapist, Ira also shared that every time someone in authority or her parents validated the vulnerable part of her, she would break down, and that she wants to “fix it”.
She said, “When I come crashing down, I need to get rid of it because I don’t want to keep crashing down. It keeps telling me that my depression isn’t serious enough, it’s not bad enough. The way I react to my depression is not bad enough for me to pay attention to it and fix it — I’ll deal with it, I’ll be fine, until you crash!”
Ira, who was recently spotted at a Mumbai restaurant with her father and brother for lunch, spoke about how after being over worked and burnt out it took her two months to get “functional” again.
“This time it has taken me two months to slightly become functional again, so I really don’t want to go through this again, but I will, it is just the matter of time — when. I guess, I just have to tame that voice and be nicer to myself. And, hopefully with my therapist I’ll figure it out,” Ira concluded.