Express LOL: Here’s how India can save itself from Ebola

Here are 6 great ideas to tackle Ebola in India. Alert: Don't take them seriously...

| New Delhi | Published:November 20, 2014 2:15 pm

It was only a matter of time. Ebola has visited more countries recently than Narendra Modi and, just like him, it might soon be in India. We need a plan to fight this deadly disease, and stop it from becoming an epidemic.

But this plan must be unconventional – we need out of the box thinking. Here are 6 great ideas.

1)  Use Rajinikanth: Because human beings are afraid of an Ebola epidemic, but Ebola is constantly afraid of a Rajini epidemic.

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2) Hold a special screening for Ebola: Of the movies Happy New Year and Kick back to back. In less than a day, the virus will run away screaming.

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3) Send it to Rampal’s hideout in Hisar: It will take 8 years before it is able to escape, and even then it’ll need a squadron of policemen.

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4) Make sure it gets washed away: By the wave which reduced the Congress Party to a group of hobbyists, the Modi Wave.

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5) Call in Virat Kohli: Maybe Ebola needs an adversary who is young, confident, and is not shy about kissing it goodbye?

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6) Give it a really bad headache: By asking it to explain every plot twist and physics loophole in the 180 minute experience that is Interstellar. And, when we say explain, we mean ‘…to Kim Kardashian’.

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