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If the psychological tests conducted by city-based school counsellors are anything to by,the rate of depression has gone up among students of Classes V to XII in the last few years. The counsellors say a lack of emotional security and particularly the lack of adequate attention from parents,has begun to frustrate children.
City schools,nowadays,conduct regular sessions,where counsellors personally meet parents and let them know about their childs strong points. The school counsellors also state that in most cases it is the parents,who require counselling,more than the children.
To see your mother cooking food after you get back home from school,is a rare sight now. A child might have been bullied in the school bus,or might have had a bad day at school,but there is no one to listen to him, says Megha Sharma,counsellor at St Stephens School in Sector 45.
There are many things that children do and it goes unnoticed in the eyes of the parents which usually makes them feel incapacitated. Parents do not spend quality time with their children,to compensate that,they provide their children with everything that they ask for. The children get so much ahead of time,that they do not have to wait for rewards and this has turned them impatient. A single denial of their wishes thereby leads them to think that they are not being loved and cared for, adds Megha.
The counsellors also noted that the level of expectation has increased from both sides (parents and children). You know more,you want more. This is the principle being followed now, says Kanika Manaktala,a former counsellor of Vivek High School in Sector 38,Chandigarh.
She also points out that children,these days,have become vocal and do not hesitate in expressing themselves,and thus with no guidance,they tend to reflect everything they imagine.
The city-based counsellors also warn parents to keep an eye on the web content being accessed by their teenagers. Expressing their feelings on social networking sites and expecting sympathy is another reason for children falling into the phase of depression. When the children receive sympathy,they form a self satisfying nature and believe that they have the biggest problems in the world, says Aditi Walia,counsellor at Delhi Public School,Chandigarh Sector 40.
Also,parents these days have high level of aspirations for their children. Everyone needs a genius and no one is satisfied with an average child. Both,the children and parents are working on the extremes and need prompt results which ultimately results in pressure for both. Parents should not force their children into every field,rather they should be made master of one,under proper guidance, adds Aditi.
Another counsellor at Delhi Public School,Shangrila Dubey,says: Talking to parents makes it easier for us to handle the childs problems. No matter what the problem is,family,studies,friends,parents should know about the problem and further help us in extracting solutions. Observing a childs behaviour and being positive towards the child does great help and that is why we prefer talking to parents.
CBSE results add
to parent woes
With the results of Class X CBSE examination being declared last week and as many as 1,000 students from across the Tricity securing the perfect 10 CGPA,parents appear to be fuming. According to the school counsellors,many parents have been ringing in and sharing their woes over the subversion in the spirit of competition among their children. Parents also complain that the grading system has made their children careless,according to the counsellors.